What's it look like?

This is what you see when you look down my hallway.

The room at the end of the hall used to be my dads.

He moved out.

I really don't know what I think.

It probably hasn't hit me yet.

One thing I do know... More Closet Space!!!

I also programmed my dads' new phone number into my cell today..

I saved his number as "Dad Home."

That was weird.

I haven't blogged in a while.

untitled.

What if we could
Put our lives on
Hold and meet some
Where inside of the world
I would meet you
Would you meet me?

the silence is terrifying......

mallory scared.


really scared...

I framed my GED and hung it on my wall tonight for my mom.

Well....

I don't really know what to say... I've been weird lately..

I don't know why..

I don't know why I don't know.

Hmm.

Well As a Matter of Fact..

I did happen to get a perm on Saturday. I finally did it. I'm still a little nervous. I get compliments from everybody. Which shouldn't be too big of a suprise. i think once the curls loosen (?) I will love it. Right now I just really like it alot. As far as low maintence... It's everything I had dreamed it would be. Except for maybe the $75 I spent on it. I'll post better pictures later..

I must call it a night.. It's 3:15 and I can't seem to fall asleep.. It's because I am too excited.

I wish it was 2:45 in the afternoon.

I can't hardly wait to get pieces of my cervix cut off.

Must be nice.

ALOT of people are jealous of my good fortune.. (or glad they're not me, heh)

But I found the COACH purse I have been dreaming about for a good year and a half now at Dillards. It's $198.00. That's a little steep, but I think it's worth it. My mom is taking me to the mall after my cervix scrape to get me the purse for my birthday. (which by the way is right around the corner) Yay!!

Then we're going to Kelley's. My mom has been dying to go. So we're going. Yay!!

One Medium Size Happy Family.

Sorta.

At least I think we are all happy in this picture.

This picture could be worth like $10 someday. Assuming it's in a frame.

This would be the first picture in which all 4 of us are in it.

....................................................................

I woke up at 9:39 this morning.

I was supposed to be at work at 10:00.

I need at least an hour to get ready.

So what did I do?......

Closed my eyes and went back to sleep.

I never do this.

My mind has been somewhere else all day..

I can't believe I did that.

My Dog.

I can't believe how stunning Bella looks in these pictures. They turned out great. Don't hesitate to leave me lots of comments complimenting my Beautiful American Pit Bull Terrier or my Awesome Photographing Ability.

Tick Tock Tick Tock..

I'm not sure if this day could go by any slower.. It's only been an hour and I've already blogged twice..

Mallory is obviously nervous.

Heh.

When asked, I said no.

I lied.

I'm not going to be alive much longer, I know it.

2 hours, 41 minutes till I will sit (or lay) face to face with Dr. Korman.

It will all be over with 7 minutes after it starts. The doctor has a way with rushing in, saying something totally weird & making you feel uncomfortable, debriefing on your problem, ignoring your questions then rushing out.

I don't know how long this appointment will last.

Maybe 8 minutes.

I'm a bit nervous. And hungry.

I've decided that I should spend my time wisely at work by blogging.

I'm really hungry.

He said he liked my hair. It makes me look fun.

My mom said my hair looked cute. And that I have naturally curly hair. (??)

They're only saying those things because I'm dying of cancer.

I laugh everytime I see this picture. I see this picture alot because it's my desktop background.

It's funny.

It's funny cuz it's probably true.

I so got her..

I got her so good.

Good Night.

not sure.

I wanna hear what you have to say about me
Hear if you're gonna live without me
I wanna hear what you want
I remember december
And I wanna hear what you have to say about me
Hear if you're gonna live without me
I wanna hear what you want
What the hell do you want?

Suprisingly Upsetting.

I went up to the office this evening to see what I could do to help with the overwhelming/massive order that is currently being filled. I learned that my help was not needed among other things..

He and I were "talking mess" to one another, as usual, usually no hard feelings...

Usually no hard feelings.........

Until someones parent gets involved.

Some time during our meaningless discussion, he called me a prostitute. Before I had a chance to respond, a third party joined in...

I'm thinking the "third party" was trying to "soften the blow" for me. Make me feel better. (about my night job, heh)

Third Party: Aahh <>

"Mallory would make a good prostitute".

*ENTIRE PARTY*: Laughter that lasted exactly 3 minutes and 23 seconds. I could have heard an "Ooohhh" and a "That's F*d Up", but I'm not sure.

Normally, having everybody in the room laughing AT me (not with me) wouldn't have caused me to freeze. I'm usually pretty good at just laughing things off..

But the level of awkwardness was increasing so quickly, I was speechless, and I'm sure the look on my face was close to upsetting..

Don't worry, the "third party" makes another attempt to spare my feelings..

I really don't feel comfortable sharing with my readers what the "third partys'" words of encouragement were, but I will say..

The "third party" explained/listed MORE THAN FIVE reasons why "Mallory would make a good prostitute."

Ya.. Pretty much..

I pretended like the "third party" made me feel better..

But I actually felt like taking a few showers then going to church Sunday morning..

This should teach me to stay away from the office when I'm not getting paid.

________________________________________________________________________________

How does one become a prostitute?

The Truth Comes Out.

Although I have had a crazy & eventful 2 weeks, they're not entirely to blame for my recent tardiness. I'm sure many have been asking lately:

Where's Mallory?

Wasn't Mallory supposed to be at work at 10? (or 1)

Where's the greeting card girl?

Why is my daughter taking so long to come when I call her in my room?

Did my mom forget to feed me today?

How does one become as pretty/cute/funny/awesome as Mallory? (heh)

I'm sure there were more..

Fortunately, I have good news.. That being the picture I posted with this entry..

It's a puzzle.

That I've been working on.

I spent the most time on it when i was supposed to be somewhere..

Hate me if you want to.

Don't care where you think you've been,
and how you're getting over
If you think you've got me down
Just wait it gets much colder

Here I am,
As perfect as i'm ever gonna be
You'll see
Love me for me
Stick around,
I'm not the kinda girl you wanna leave
You'll see
Love me for me

What's a du-rag?

A do-rag, also spelled doo-rag or durag is a simple piece of cloth tied at the back, used to cover the head.

From the 1930s to the 1960s, they were used by African-American men to hold chemically processed hair-dos in place while they slept. Originally they were made from pieces of handkerchief or women's stockings, now they are made from polyester. Do-rags resurged as a fashion trend among urban youth in the 1970s and 1990s. Typically, do-rags are black, but can be worn in other colors. Do-rags are also regularly used to maintain cornrowed hairstyles.

The history of the do-rag is most notably attributed to Civil War era slaves, but its first appearance seems to predate that time. It is, however, most closely associated with Afro-American culture because the slaves brought that style with them from their native lands.

Hip hop artists such as Tupac Shakur, LL Cool J, Ja Rule, 50 Cent and Nelly have helped popularize do-rags among mainstream audiences by incorporating them in their dress.

The Good Enough Degree...

I got one in the mail today.. Pretty swell I suppose. I showed my dad, he patted me on the back and told me "good job". He also took the documents' measurements so he could go purchase a frame to put it in. That's nice of him.. I can't remember my dad ever telling me "good job" ever in my 22 years..Then again, that 6 year dope smoking extravaganza I participated in stole many of my memories from me. So there's a chance that he has said that to me..

So what's it like to have completed my high school education? I don't know.. I'm confused.. I don't know why really. I've cried like 6 times.. For what? Not sure.. Maybe I'm scared.

As horrible as this may sound, it's the only conclusion that I keep coming to in my head.. Here goes:
I've become so accustomed to being a "screw up" for not even having my high school diploma, and for not really doing much of anything. I just kept this title of being Mallory who didn't want to grow up and start doing the right thing with her life. I'm not sure how long I wanted it to last, I never really gave it much thought. But now that I'm a high school graduate, have I lost some of that person I was this morning? It's weird.. Maybe I'm thinking about it too much. I know one things for sure.. I can put that DAMN GED practice book that weighs approximately 6lbs (probably not, but.) somewhere out of my sight. I actually went and purchased myself an early Graduation present. It's a "learn to play the piano" book. I decided if I'm going to be finished with high school, I should have some kind of special talent.. I'm going with the piano. heh.

Temporary Change in Thought.. Wha?

I was originally planning on debriefing on my current state, but it's late and I don't feel like it anymore. Instead, I know how my readers have been dying to see my fish. So I finally decided to take some pics of them. The reason it's taken me so long to take pictures of my fish is because I've always thought it would be difficult, with the glare/flash/bowl and whatnot.. But our quick photo session went rather well. Turns out, my 2 fish are extremely photogenic, pros in front of the camera. Wonder where they get it from? The red one is Atticus and the not as pretty multi-colored one is Po.

I don't know.....

So why do you fill my sorrow
With the words you've borrowed
From the only place you've know
And why do you sing Hallelujah
If it means nothing to you
Why do you sing with me at all?

One Mans Trash Is Another Mans Treasure... Or Valentines Present.

I really don't find it necessary to say much because the picture should say more than enough.. Today is definitely... My day!

Thanx Pappi!

She swears the cat started it.

It happened last night.. It started as a harmless & playful chase around the house, but it ended a bit different this time. By the time I had reached the "crime scene" it almost appeared as if I could have been too late. There lyed Johnny Boy on his back with Bellas mouth wrapped around his stomach. Normally, my sister and I would find sick & twisted humor out of a situation like this... But Bella's tail was no longer wagging...

She looked pissed.

Not Good.

Once I gained control of Bella (kinda) and Johnny ran out of the room, my mom came in to see what was going on.. That's when we saw Bs face.. There was enough blood on her face & in her mouth to send me into a total panic attack. Bella made it extremely difficult to check out her injuries because apparently all she could think about was getting Johnny... still.

Back when Bella was a bit smaller and definitely not as powerful, I would have not thought twice about the situation that just happened. Bella was still considered a "baby", I guess, and she only chased Johnny because she was curious..

She sees something moving and wants to see what it is. You'd think Johnny would just sit still to avoid the intense chases. Maybe he hasn't seen Jurrassic Park.

f*ck a title.

My day began with a little puppy sitting that actually went pretty well. Very good puppy. Then it was off to Houston with my mom to go work at The Aquarium Downtown. As usual, my mom and I spent about 10% of our time working and the rest of the time we played.

We got to touch a Stingray.
We got to see 1 day old baby sharks, and shark eggs that are waiting to hatch.
We found Nemo and got a picture of him.
We saw an Anaconda.
We saw an Electric Eel.
We saw Seahorses.
We saw a Tirantula.
We saw a White Tiger.
We saw alot of other underwater creatures as well, but none of them come to mind..

Needless to say, I had a pretty good time and got to help my mom out too.

Then our two-faced, shady, unprofessional bosses decide to spread our personal business to others and blame it on me. ME? What the hell?

They say he just graduated from college... It looks like he just graduated intermediate school. How dare he make my mother cry... And then make it out to be my fault... He's lucky he's my boss.. I'd tell him to go kill himself or at least eat a dick if he wasn't my boss.

And just when we thought the day couldn't get any worse.....

**Door Bell**

IT'S SPEEDY TURTLE DELIVERY SERVICE!!

Somebody must be in a big hurry to leave.. I wonder if he's ever going to take his two daughters feelings into consideration.

Who knows? Technically, he doesn't have to. We are 22 and 19. He doesn't have to say a damn thing to us, it scares me to think that he won't.

Good Night.

I'm really popular. I'm lying.

So I just finished watching Napoleon Dynamite for the fifth time in a row. Its in my "top 10", it would be in my "top 5" if it wasn't in everyone elses. People ruin things.

Napoleon and I are much a like. Alot of people probably would say the same about themselves and Napoleon. Their reasoning would probably include something about their "true inner nerd". Fair enough, being a nerd is the second best thing to be besides yourself. But I can't help but think about the majority of females in my grade (when I attended school) and what they think about the movie Napoleon Dynamite. Most of them would claim to be a "secret Napoleon". I would have to disagree.

Maybe I'm just selfish.

But they're not even close to resembling Napoleon.

I am. I am because I have no friends. I just never had the "balls" to get up in front of the entire school and do my dance.

I tried dancing in front of the entire school, but apparently ruined the whole performance because I had to wear glasses. My glasses made all of the Arabian Nights Dancers look bad that evening. I liked my glasses up until that day. I would have continued to wear my glasses shamelessly if it weren't for that girl who asked me if I could try dancing without them.

---------

Not sure where I was going with that.. Maybe, if any of the girls I mentioned earlier were to do their nerdy retarded dances in front of the whole school, they'd be showered with compliments and their mothers would be waiting outside with a bouquet of roses. Must be nice.

I never provided anyone other than my family with my true creative inner genius/entertainer. I knew they wouldn't place too hard of judgments on me if I seemed to be a little "too weird" sometimes.

Maybe that's why God created the family. Just in case your dance doesn't cut it.

----------

I chose this picture because I really wanted to have a silly picture, and well..... maybe only my little sister will be able to fully appreciate it.

This year, The Grinch dropped a bomb.

I've always said that I could never actually hate someone unless they did something to hurt my mom. (or the rest of my family) I know I've done a number on her, and hate myself for the things I have put her through. But what if the person who hurts my mother, is my father? For the last 21 years, he's been right about everything, unfortunately.. Until last night...........

We all knew this was coming... It was just a question as to when it would come. I really feel like my dad picked a good time to give my mom the bad news. My mom busts her ass all day, everyday to pay off her bills & provide for my sister and I. There's not a whole lot my mother would not for somebody in need. She gave and gave and gave all year long, not expecting anything in return. She definitely did not deserve what she got this Christmas. But my dad did, or will. Must be nice.

Merry Christmas Kathy, Mallory, Molly, Chloe, Bella, Johnny, Quasar and Rupert... Have a nice life. Good luck finding a place to live and whatever else you might need to stay alive.

The Roj is saying "Peace Out".

I'm completely lost. I can't begin to imagine what my poor mom has to be feeling right now. But I know that I myself am unable to think about anything other than the current situation at 1401 Edinburgh. I'm scared.. I haven't eaten since Monday afternoon, I can't eat. I can't see, my eyes burn so bad. And normally I do a good job of covering up my pain, but not anymore. I can't sleep.. I just don't understand alot of things.. And I'm having a difficult time trusting my dad now.. I overheard him say something that I still can't believe he said. I had alot of respect for my father up until the other night. Men are assholes..

I'm going to try and get a few hours of sleep.

It's been a while..

I know.. You guys were probably wondering, "How has Mallory been doing"?

I'll tell you.

***********DRUM ROLL***************

I got my very own....................

TELXON!!!

I have to brush my shoulders off on this one because I know everyone is jealous.

Don't be hatin'!

I'm not going to give an explanation for what a TELXON actually is, but for those of you who already know, which is probably just my sister....

Molly, You know that right now... My life is good..

Yeah.

HELP!!

NuF sEd.

I'm off to Target to do some good ol' SBT Returns!!

WOO HOO!